Reason Why I Am A One Animal Person

Animals love me. They want to be near me...on me...under me. Whatever they can get. Our cute kitty Cheeseburger learned that the hard way when she lasted a week before I caught kitty claustrophobia and insisted on taking her back to the shelter (sorry).

For everyone's future reference, I enjoy having one singular pet. The above picture is proof that any more is just awful. You can see my toes in the picture. Through inference you can guess that ALL three (3) dogs are playing DIRECTLY under me. They have no sense of personal space. And like them as I may, I have a low animal tolerance.

Dem Doggies

These are the pups that I love! Usually.

Waffle. AKA my biggest competition for Matt's heart. Promise you will see her crazy face again. Plenty.


And Rowdy. Pretty sure she will be a rockin dog in a few years, but the training is still wearing on me.


Oh, you think I am being mean? To a poor poor puppy? Poor Rowdy, look how sad she is...


Oh, wait a minute, did you see that?


Yeah, that's right, she tore clean through my beautiful dream couch from Crate and Barrel. Only the one that I had been stalking for years. Yes, I stalk couches. Beautiful light colored linen couches. And there are more holes along the edge, but it is best for our relationship if I try and overlook these faults. Faults like spilling bleach on the front room carpet, or eating our wedding Bible. Mmm, that's nice.